Hello, it’s been a while
I hope your Christmas was better than mine. Let me tell you about my Christmas Surprise.
Through cruising for men on the internet, my supposed ‘life partner’ found out that a casual ex from years ago was single again. He promptly got in touch, told him that I was out of town and that we were having problems, then went over to Bethnal Green and shagged him.
Well if we weren’t having problems before, we certainly are now.
I have been cheated on with a rancid-looking effeminate psychic. With his powers he should have foreseen that it wouldn’t end well. I caught them red handed. I hope they both get torn apart by hungry terrapins.
Oh well, I have been meaning to polish off my magnificent column for ages. I’ve got loads to tell you…..I just have to remember what it is.